You Need to Know

The following are the things that majority of the human raise do not know.

1. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
2. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
3. A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.
4. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.
5. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
6. A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
7. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
8. A snail can sleep for three years.
9. Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer. 
10. All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill. 
11. Almonds are a member of the peach family. 
12. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. 
13. Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age. 
14. Butterflies taste with their feet. 
15. Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds. Dogs only have about 10.
16. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".
17. February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon. 
18. In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated. 
19. If the population of China walked past you, in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction. 
20. If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights. 
21. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. 
22. Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors. 
23. Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable. 
24. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple. 
25. On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag. 
26. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. 
27. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.
28. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated. "Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right. 
29. The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing. 
30. The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns. 
31. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. 
32. The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet. 
33. The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid. 
34. The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).
35. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
36. There are more chickens than people in the world.
37. There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous. 
38. There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious." 
39. There's no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewable Vitamins. 
40. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur. 
41. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
42. Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance. 
43. Women blink nearly twice as much as men. 
44. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.

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Stroke

Blood Clots/Stroke - They Now Have a Fourth Indicator, the Tongue.
 This is good info to remember and use.

STROKE: Remember  The 1st Three Letters.... S.T.R.

My nurse friend sent this and encouraged me to post it and spread the word.  I agree.

If everyone can remember something this simple, we could save some folks. Seriously..

Please read:

STROKE IDENTIFICATION:

During a BBQ, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine (they offered to call paramedics) ....she said she had just

tripped over a brick because of her new shoes.

They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food. While she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening

Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00 pm Ingrid passed away.) She had suffered a stroke at

the BBQ. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today. Some don't die.... they end up in a helpless,
hopeless condition instead.

It only takes a minute to read this...

A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke... totally . He said the trick was

getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting
the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough.

RECOGNIZING A STROKE

Thank God for the sense to remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!

Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster. The stroke victim may suffer severe brain

damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke
.
Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions: 

S * Ask the individual to SMILE.

T * Ask the person to TALK and SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently)
(i.e. It is sunny out today)

R * Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS.

If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call 999/911 immediately and describe the
symptoms to the dispatcher.

New Sign of a Stroke -------- Stick out Your Tongue

NOTE: Another 'sign' of a stroke is this: Ask the person to 'stick' out his tongue.. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other , that

is also an indication of a stroke.

A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that at least one life will be saved.

Pre-Nuptial Agreement

A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive restaurant in uptown New York.

The ambassador was so enthralled by the beauty and presence of this secretary that he asked her to marry him. The secretary was startled, but remembered that her boss told her never to insult foreign dignitaries, so she decided to let him down easy.

"I'll only marry you under three conditions."

"Anything, anything," said the ambassador.

"First, you must buy me a 14-karat gold wedding band with a 72 carat diamond, along with a 28 inch studded matching necklace for our engagement."

Without hesitation, the ambassador picked up his cellular phone, called his personal accountant, told him the instructions, and said, "Yes, yes, I buy, I buy!"

The secretary thought that her first request was too easy, so she thought of a more difficult situation.

"Second, I want you to build me a 58-acre mansion in the richest part of the Poconos along with a 40 acre summer home in the sweetest vineyards of France."

The ambassador picked up his phone, called his personal broker in New York, then called another broker in France, and after his quick conversation, he said, "Yes, yes, I build, I build!"

The secretary was very startled, and knew she must think of a final request hat would be impossible to live up to.

"Finally," she said. "I'll only marry you if you have a 10 inch penis."

A sad face befell the ambassador, and he cupped his face in his hands.

After weeping in his native language for a few minutes, the ambassador lowly lifted his head and said, "Ok, ok, I cut, I cut!"

Filipino Names- Naturalized US Citizen

 Macario Maldonado - Mac Donald

 Remegio Batungbacal - Remington Steel

 Victoria Malihim - Victoria Secret

 Bienvenido Jurado - Ben Hur

 Juanito Lakarin - Johnny Walker

 Federico Hagibis - Federal Express

 Esteban Magtaka - Stevie Wonder

 Jaime Bondoc - James Bond

 Leon Mangubat - Tiger Woods

 Eleuterio Ignacio - Electronic Ignition

 Burgus Bahag-Hari - Burger King

 Kasimiro Bukaykay - Cashmere Bouquet

 Maria Calas - Mary Kay

 Rogelio Dagdagan - Roger Moore

 Topacio Mamaril - Top Gun

 Restituto Pruto - Tutti Frutti

 Samuel Tampipi - Sam Sonite

 Veneracion De Asis - Venereal Disease

 Alfonso De Asis - Alzheimer Disease

 Francisco Portero - Frank Porter

 Diosdado Durante - Deo Dorant

 Roberto Controlado - Bert Control

 Marcelo Controlado - Muscle Control

 Carpio Llanes - Carpool Lanes

Julia Domingo - Holy Sunday

 Maria Pascua - Mary Christmas

 Ligaya Anonuevo - Happy New Year

 Ligaya Almundo - Joy To The World

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Part Time Job

In Tokyo, Japan, Domino's Pizza is hiring anyone aged more than 18 years old.and no experience required. They will also be the one to proved the uniform and salary offer is $31, 000.00 per work hour or 2, 500, 000.00 yen. This offer is only for the month of December of this year.

--->>> Read more about this story <<<---

courtesy of ph.news.yahoo.com

Breasts for $10, 000.00

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for 100 dollars?"
"Are you nuts?", she replies. And keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does. "Would you let me bite your breasts for 1,000 dollars?" he asks again."Listen sir, I'm not that kind of woman. Got it?" So the guy runs again around the next block and faces her again: "Would you let me bite your breasts for 10,000 dollars?" She thinks about it for a while and says "Hmmm 10,000 dollars eh? OK, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there" So they went to that alley and she takes off the blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them he jumps on them and start caressing them, fondling them, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them... but no biting. In the end the woman gets all annoyed and asks: "Are you gonna bite them or what?" "Nah", he replies. "Too expensive"

The 47 Year-Old Lady

A middle aged women decides to have a face-lift for her birthday.
She spends $5000 and feels pretty good about the results.

On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper.
Before leaving she says to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," is the reply. "I'm exactly 47, " the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter
girl the very same question. She replies, "I guess about 29." The
woman replies, "Nope, I'm 47." Now she's feeling really good about
herself.

She stops in a drug store on her way down the street.
She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk
this burning question. The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she
proudly responds, "I am 47, but thank you."

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man the
same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eye sight is going.
Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a
woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put
my hands under your bra. Then I can tell you exactly how old you
are."

Best Web Cam

I'm using web camera application. I
can webcast Internet video to view my site
from anywhere.

With my new

webcamera application, I can run a streaming webcast
of my site viewable from the Internet. This opens up a league
of opportunities, the surface of which has not even been scratched in today's world. I can use
this webcast for surveillance purposes, allowing me to watch what's going on in my site
at any moment from a remote viewing station.

As long as I have the web camera
running and a remote computer with Online access, I can watch the apartment.
With the software and the webcam, I can change the settings to capture video,
sense movement (if I don't want to keep the webcam running at all times),
or use a mixture of a online feed and recorded video to implement a security
system that takes full benefit of novel technology.

With a capture card,
I can simply move relevant video and screenshots to use on
any workstation.

With delicate files on my workstation
and expensive stuff in my room,
it only makes sense to have a protection setup that I can supervise whenever I feel that my privacy
is being compromised. If I owned a small firm or lived with roommates, I couldn't imagine
living without it.

Web camera software senses motion, triggers
siren, captures images, records video, and sends captured images by e-mail

Webcams
are fine for more than just making ip conversations
more realistic. They can furthermore be
an enormously helpful device
for exploit in residence or corporation security.

Application
is now available that can sense movement and use
it as a trigger for various actions.


The way that
it works is to analyze the picture sent by a camera that is either attached using USB
or using a video capture card for motion. After it picks up
that motion, it can then acquire any number of actions,
including triggering an siren.

A more popular software, though, is to either
send live frames of what is happening in the picture that is covered by the webcam
or to even broadcast via live streaming precisely what is
happening with both sound and image. If installed secretly,
this software could even be used for clandestine surveillance.

Given the
large amount of systems that either have a webcamera connected
or can support one, this is an perfect way to inexpensively and effortlessly protect
the zone across that property
from intrusion or robbery.

Streaming live video and audio from capture device
through camera server application

Surveillance application

If you find yourself with a need to record security video with a webcam over an area,

webcam
computer software

may be the right choice for you. Using this application, it is possible to set up a
camera to detect movement and begin recording when it does.

Depending on your needs, the sights and sounds that are picked up by the webcam may be stored on a hard drive, or if the captured video
needs to be available off-site, can be webcast using the server's broadcasting
function to a web site.

Depending on the quality of the webcam and the viewer's video card, the picture that is recorded may be as clear as a high-definition tv signal.
Using a install like this, it is possible to provide a measure of surveillance for an area when
the economics of the situation do not justify hiring a security firm or setting up a professional monitoring system.

This

do-it-yourself approach

can save money while not compromising on protection.

Honest Mistake

A DINNER CONVERSATION THAT WENT WRONG

WIFE: "If I died first, would you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"

WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"

HUSBAND: "Of course I do."

WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."

WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).

WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"

HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"

WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"

HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"

HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."

WIFE: - - - silence - - -

HUSBAND: "Shittt."

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It's my favourite Internet TV. It's so easy and convenient to use.
There are number of Interenet portals that provide you to watch Television channels.
Did you miss your preferred station last night?
Or if you prefer to watch remakes of old shows?
It's very easy to recall them. You can find them on
video web pages such as Internet television software,
or social networking pages like MySpace. They always show
you one or two parts of the favorite or most viewed shows.
You can even find stations that presented only on the Online.
They last for a short time, but are worth watching.
Online TV is the newest technology brought to us by the amazing discovery of the Internet.
Ever wonder what television channels are like in France, or England or India? It's easy to find out, just turn on your
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account on the internet. It's that simple. Could you have imagined even 20 years ago that
you would be able to tune in and watch a TV series from another part of the world?
Whether you connected from work to watch CNN, BBC or another news streaming station's online stream of a campaign
event or you watched it on some other device such as your cellular phone or iPOD, you were able to stay on top of current news
with the help of Live Internet television and live tv stations.

The Painting of the Son

A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art.

When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.

About a month later, just before Christmas,

  There was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.

He said, 'Sir, you don't know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly. He often talked about you, and your love for art.' The young man held out this package. 'I know this isn't much.. I'm not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this.'

The father opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man. He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture.. 'Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It's a gift.'


The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.

The man died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings. Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection.

On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. 'We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?' There was silence. Then a voice in the back of the room shouted, "We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one". But the auctioneer persisted. "Will somebody bid for this painting? Who will start the bidding? $100, $200"? Another voice angrily. "We didn't come to see this painting. We came to see the Van Gogh's, the Rembrandts. Get on with the  real bids"! But still the auctioneer continued. "The son! The son! Who'll take the son?". Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. "I'll give $10 for the painting" Being a poor man, it was all he could afford. "We have $10, who will bid $20?". "Give it to him for $10. Let's see the masters".

The crowd was becoming angry. They didn't want the picture of the son. They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections. The auctioneer pounded the gavel. "Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!" A man sitting on the second row shouted, "Now let's get on with the collection!". The auctioneer laid down his gavel. "I'm sorry, the auction is over.". "What about the paintings?". "I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will. I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.

The man who took the son gets everything!'

God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: 'The son, the son, who'll take the son?' 

Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything. 

FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON, WHO SO EVER BELIEVETH, SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE...THAT'S LOVE 

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The Top Five Cancer-Causing Foods

1. Hot Dogs 

Because they are high in nitrates, the Cancer Prevention Coalition advises that children eat no more than 12 hot dogs a month. If you can't live without hot dogs, buy those made without sodium nitrate.

2. Processed meats and Bacon

Also high in the same sodium nitrates found in hot dogs, bacon, and other processed meats raise the risk of heart disease. The saturated fat in bacon also contributes to cancer.

3. Doughnuts 

Doughnuts are cancer-causing double trouble. First, they are made with white flour, sugar, and hydrogenated oils, then fried at high temperatures. Doughnuts, says Adams , may be the worst food you can possibly eat to raise your risk of cancer.

4. French fries 

Like doughnuts, French fries are made with hydrogenated oils and then fried at high temperatures. They also contain cancer- causing acryl amides which occur during the frying process. They should be called cancer fries, not French fries, said Adams .

5. Chips, crackers, and cookies

All are usually made with white flour and sugar. Even the ones whose labels claim to be free of trans-fats generally contain small amounts of trans-fats.

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UNE SOCIETE SUISSE VEND SON OR Bonjour à tous et à toutes Une vraiment bonne nouvelle aujourd

The Main Causes of Liver Damage

1. Sleeping too late and waking up too late are main cause.

2. Not urinating in the morning

3 . Too much eating

4. Skipping breakfast.

5. Consuming too much medication. 

6. Consuming too much preservatives, additives, food coloring, and artificial sweetener

7. Consuming unhealthy cooking oil. 

As much as possible reduce cooking oil use when frying, which includes even the best cooking oils like olive oil. Do not consume fried foods when you are tired, except if the body is  very fit. 

8. Consuming raw (overly done) foods also add to the burden of liver.

Veggies should be eaten raw or cooked 3-5 parts. Fried veggies should be finished in one sitting, do not store. We should prevent this without necessarily spending more. We just have to adopt a good daily lifestyle and eating habits. Maintaining good eating habits and time condition are very important for our bodies to absorb and get rid of unnecessary chemicals according to 'schedule.' 

Greater Love Has No One Than This

A little boy was selling newspapers on the corner,

the people were in and out of the cold.

The little boy was so cold that he wasn't trying to sell

many papers.

He walked up to a policeman and said,

"Mister,

you wouldn't happen to know where a poor boy could

find a warm place to sleep tonight would you?

You see, I sleep in a box up around the corner there and

down the alley and it's awful cold in there for tonight.

Sure would be nice to have a warm place to stay."

The policeman looked down at the little boy and said, "You

go down the street to that big white house and you knock

on the door. When they come out the door you just say

John 3:16, and they will let you in."

BRAIN DAMAGING HABITS

1. No Breakfast 
People who do not take breakfast are going to have a lower blood sugar level. This leads to an insufficient supply of nutrients to the brain causing brain degeneration. 

2 . Overeating
It causes hardening of the brain arteries, leading to a decrease in mental power. 

3. Smoking
It causes multiple brain shrinkage and may lead to Alzheimer disease. 

4. High Sugar consumption
Too much sugar will interrupt the absorption of proteins and nutrients causing malnutrition and may interfere with brain development. 

5. Air Pollution 
The brain is the largest oxygen consumer in our body. Inhaling polluted air decreases the supply of oxygen to the brain, bringing about a decrease in brain efficiency. 

6 . Sleep Deprivation
Sleep allows our brain to rest.. Long term deprivation from sleep will accelerate the death of brain cells.. 

7. Head covered while sleeping 
Sleeping with the head covered increases the concentration of carbon dioxide and decrease concentration of oxygen that may lead to brain damaging effects. 

8. Working your brain during illness
Working hard or studying with sickness may lead to a decrease in effectiveness of the brain as well as damage the brain. 

9. Lacking in stimulating thoughts
Thinking is the best way to train our brain, lacking in brain stimulation thoughts may cause brain shrinkage. 

10. Talking Rarely
Intellectual conversations will promote the efficiency of the brain 

What Starts with F and ends with cK ?

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"

Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"

Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.

Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Harry: "9."

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"

Harry: "36."

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.

The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade"

Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."

The principal and Harry both agreed.

Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"

Harry, after a moment: "Legs."

Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!

Harry replied: "Pockets."

Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"

Harry: "Pants."

Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?"

Harry: "Coconut."

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.

Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"

The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied, "Bubble gum."

Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?"

Harry: "Shake hands."

The principal was trembling.

Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?"

Harry: "Firetruck."

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong.

WHAT IS LOVE?

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing, And your voice caught within your chest?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Like.

You can’t keep your eyes or hands off of them, am I right?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Lust.

Are you proud, and eager to show them off?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Luck.

Do you want them because you know they’re there?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Loneliness.

Are you there because it’s what everyone wants?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Loyalty.

Do you stay for their confessions of Love, because you don’t want to hurt them?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Pity.

Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand?
 It isn’t Love, it’s being unconfident.

Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Infatuation.

 Do you pardon their faults because you care about them?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Friendship.

Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of?
 It isn’t Love, it’s a Lie.

Are you willing to give all of your favorite things for their sake?
 It isn’t Love, it’s Charity.

 Then what is called love??


 Does your heart ache and break when they’re sad?
 Then it’s Love.


 Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret?
 Then it’s Love.


 Do you accept their faults because they’re a part of who they are?
 Then it’s Love.


 Do you cry for their pain, even when they’re strong?
 Then it’s Love.


 Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts?
 Then it’s Love.


But do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and elation pulls you close and holds you?
Then it’s Love.


Would you give them your heart, your life, your death?
 Then it’s Love


Now, if Love is painful, and tortures us so,why do we Love? Why is it all we search for in life?
This pain, this agony? Why is it all we long for? This torture, this powerful death of self?
Why? Because it’s…Love

Miss Universe

Miss Universe Beauty Pageant Q & A Portion

The FINALISTS :

• Miss America
• Miss Spain
• Miss Britain
• Miss Philippines
• Miss Iran
• Miss India
• Miss Japan

QUESTION : Ms. America, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. AMERICA : Well, I would say that male organs in America are like gentlemen.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. AMERICA : Because it stands everytime it sees a woman.....

(Applause!.... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Spain, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. SPAIN : Male organs in our country are like toros in our very own bullfight.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. SPAIN : Because it charges everytime it sees an opening.

(Applause!... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Britain, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. BRITAIN : Male organs in our country are like Shakespearian actors and Heroes.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. BRITAIN : Because it cries after every performance and because it is buried alive.

(Applause!... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Iran, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. IRAN : Well, I can say that male organs in Iran are like thieves
QUESTION : And why do you say that?
MS. IRAN : Because they always enter through the back door.....

(Applause!... Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. India, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. INDIA : Well, I can say that a male organ in India is like a labourer.
QUESTION : Why do you say that?
MS. INDIA : Because it works day and night....

(Applause!..Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Japan, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MISS JAPAN: It's like an actor in a stage play....because it bows down after every performance.

(Applause!..Applause!)

QUESTION : Ms. Philippines, how would you describe a male organ in your country?
MS. PHILIPPINES : Ahh...well, opcors, hihihihi...I can say dat male organs in our country are like chismis...
QUESTION : Chismis???
MS. PHILIPPINES : Ayy! Sorry... Its ano, ahh kuwan...it means GOSSIP in our language.
QUESTION : Hmm... Interesting comparison. And why do you say that?
MS.PHILIPPINES : Ayy...Dyahe!!!!Hi hi hi hi hi hi...Kasi....I mean because it passes from mouth to mouth..

(STANDING OVATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Reasons Not To Mess With Children.

A little girl: was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl: said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher: asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him".
_________________________________________________________________________________
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A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl: replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher: paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."


A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

________________________________________________________________________________

********************************************************************************

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.

She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"

Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or make me be unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

________________________________________________________________________________

********************************************************************************

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's  Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead. "

________________________________________________________________________________

********************************************************************************

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said,  "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run all run into my head, and I would turn red in the face.."

"Yes," the class said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't all run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted,

"Cause your feet ain't empty."

________________________________________________________________________________

********************************************************************************

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted it on the apple tray:

"Take only ONE. God is watching."

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

Don't Give up

One day I decided to quit...
I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality. .. I wanted to quit my life.
I went to the woods to have one last talk with God.
"God", I asked, "Can you give me one good reason not to quit?"
His answer surprised me...
"Look around", He said. "Do you see the fern and the bamboo?"
"Yes", I replied.
"When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them.
I gave them light.
I gave them water.
The fern quickly grew from the earth.
Its brilliant green covered the floor.
Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo.
In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful.
And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo. He said.
"In year three there was still nothing from the bamboo seed.
But I would not quit.
In year four, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. I would
not quit." He said.
"Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth. Compared
to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant. ..But just 6
months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall.
It had spent the five years growing roots. Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive.
I would not give any of my creations a challenge it could not handle."
He asked me. "Did you know, my child, that all this time you have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots".
"I would not quit on the bamboo.
I will never quit on you."
"Don't compare yourself to others."
He said.
"The bamboo had adifferent Purpose than the fern.
Yet they both make the forest beautiful."
"Your time will come", God said to me.
"You will rise high"
"How high should I rise?"
I asked.
"How high will the bamboo rise?" He asked in return.
"As high as it can?" I questioned.
"Yes." He said, "Give me glory by rising as high as you can."
I left the forest and brought back this story.
I hope these words can help you see that God will never give up on you.
Never, Never, Never Give up.
For the Christian Prayer is not an option but an opportunity.
Don't tell the Lord how big the problem is,
tell the problem how Great the Lord is!

YES: Only great minds can read this

This is weird, but interesting!

If you can raed this, you have a sgtrane mnid too

Can you raed this? Olny 55 plepoe out of 1 0 0 can.

I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If you can raed this forwrad it


FORWARD ONLY IF YOU CAN READ IT
Forward it & put 'YES' in the Subject Line

The Avalon

(Condominium For Sale - Cebu Business Park, Cebu City)

Concept

In 2010, Primary Homes Inc., one of the premier real estate developers in the Visayas and Mindanao, sets forth a high-end residential address in Cebu positioned to make a statement among the circle of elites.
Avalon, as it will be known, is a 19-storey cndominium consisting of 200 units with Modern-Asian architecture. It will feature first-class amenities to suit those meticulous in taste and will provide utter respite for a fast-paced lifestyle.
The name Avalon was derived from the mythical legend of King Arthur. 
It was a retirement island reserved for a royalty. And with that saying, this upcoming high-end residential address is exclusive for those who deserve a home spelled as luxurious elegance.
But the best thing about Avalon is that it awards the chosen few to rightfully own a residential property remarkably valued as a crown jewel. Being located in one of the most prime location of Cebu City, the overall value of the estate increases through time, so will your investment yield more returns ranging from 15% to 20% per annum. Add to this the proven-track record of Primary Homes Inc., with its years of experience in the industry, that is one of the key factors considered in appraisals by various financing institutions. 

2010 Nursing Board Exam Result

Below is the result of the 2010 Nursing Board Exam. This was released last August 25, 2010.



NLE Results July 2010 @ www.pinoyboardresults.co.cc -