Txt Msgs

___________________________________________________

***************************************************

A woman carrying a sick baby boy to the doctor...

Doctor:  Is he bottled?
Woman:  Breastfeed, Doc.

The doctor squeezes the woman's breasts repeatedly...

Doctor:  That's why he's sick. You don't have milk.
Woman:  Damn you, Doc. I am a baby sitter. BABY SITTER...!!! Next time you ask first if who's the mother!


___________________________________________________
***************************************************



I once asked a kid what does love means?

The kid answered:  hhhmmm....Love is when a man wipes your tears...

I laughed...but he added...

Kid:...Even after you left HIM hung on the cross...


___________________________________________________
***************************************************

Bungi:  whew, silawa sa adlaw oi.
Opaw:  Piskot ning bongi-a ai nagpadungog-dungog.
Bungi:  Silawa jud oi. Grabiha gyud inita.
Opaw:  Bitaw, grabi gyud inita. Tan-awa gud nang ngabil nimo nangliki sa ka init.


__________________________________________________
**************************************************



Sa botika...

Lalaki:  Dai, isa gud ka comdom.
Sales Lady:  Says, Sir.
Lalaki:  (nagblush) small lang miss.
Sales Lady:  ay, dili Sir! Says pesos ang isa.


__________________________________________________
**************************************************



Diary sa pangit:

Dear Diary,

I'm so happy! Sakpan ko sa akong crush nga nagtan-aw ko niya. Iya kong gisingkahan. Shit! Ka gwapo jud niya oi!

One time, iya ko gitulod, hulogko sa kanal. Nagdugo akong ilong. Kay ako man jud siya gituyo pagbangga. KILIG JUD KAAYO KO! hihihi ... Al least nagkadikit among skins.

Yesterday, ask siya sa akong picture kay iya daw ko ipabarang...hhmmm...REASONS kaayo siya! If I know, naa pud siya lihim na pagtingin diri nako. Ahihihihi HOW SWEET!

Ug ang pinaka the best, ingun siya nako: "FUCK YOU!"..SHOCKS! na horny ko!


___________________________________________________
***************************************************