Top Ten Excuses For Falling Asleep At Your Desk

1 "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

2 "I wasn't sleeping, I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands."

3 "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"

40 Years of Marriage

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, 'For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.'
The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband
The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.
The husband thought for a moment: 'Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me.
The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.
So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!...the husband became 92 years old.
The moral of this story: Men who are ungrateful bastards should remember fairies are female.....

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GIRLS: What were They Thinking?

When a GIRL is quiet ... millions of things are running in her mind. 

When a GIRL is not arguing ... she is thinking deeply.

When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions ... she is wondering how long you will be around.

Mental Feng Shui: Lotus Touts

 There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious .. This Lotus Touts is from the Anthony Robbins organization . It has been sent around the world ten times so far .

Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully .
Marry a man/woman you love to talk to . As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other .

1. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want .
2. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it .
3. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye .
4. Be engaged at least six months before you get married .
5. Believe in love at first sight .

WOWOWIE Q&A PORTION

These are questions and actual answers of contest participants! 

1. Q: "Kung ang light ay ilaw, ano naman ang lightning?"
  
    A: "Umiilaw!"

2. Q: "Kung vegetarian ang tawag sa kumakain ng gulay, ano ang tawag sa kumakain ng tao?

    A: "Humanitarian?"

3. Q: "Sina Michael at Raphael ay mga."

    A: "Ninja?"

4. Q: "Ano ang karaniwang kasunod ng kidlat?"

    A: "Sunog!"

5. Q: "Magbigay ng sikat na Willie."

    A: "Willie da pooh!"

Dr. Phil's Test

Below is Dr.Phil's test

(Dr. Phil scored 55, he did this on Oprah and she got 38. )  Some people pay a lot of money to find this out!

 Read on, this is very interesting!
Don't be overly sensitive!

 The following is pretty accurate and it only takes a few minutes.

Take this test for yourself and send it on to your friends..

Don't peek!

Answers are for who you are now and not who you were in the past.

 Have pen or pencil and paper ready.

 

This is a real test given by the Human Relations Dept. at many of the major corporations today.  It helps them get better insight concerning their employees and in their prospective employees.

When you are finished, forward this

 to friends, family, and also send it to the person who sent this to you.

It's only 10 Simple questions, so grab a pencil and paper, keeping track of your letter answers to each question.

 

Ready? Begin.

1. When do you feel your best..

A )  in the morning
B )  during the afternoon and early evening
C )  late at night

 2.  You usually walk..

 A )  fairly fast, with long steps

B )  fairly fast, with little steps

C )  less fast head up, looking the world in the face

D )  less fast, head down

E )  very slowly

 3.  When talking to people you....

 A )  stand with your arms folded

B )  have your hands clasped

C )  have one or both your hands on your hips

D )  touch or push the person to whom you are talking

E )   play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

 4.  When relaxing, you sit with...

 A )   your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side

B )  your legs crossed

C )  your legs stretched out or straight

D )  one leg curled under you

 5..  When something really amuses you, you react with....

 A )  big appreciated laugh

B )  a laugh, but not a loud one

C )  a quiet chuckle

D )  a sheepish smile

 6.  When you go to a party or social gathering you....

A )  make a loud entrance so everyone notices you

B )  make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know

C )  make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7.   You're working very hard, concentrating hard, and you're interrupted. ...

A )  welcome the break

B )  feel extremely irritated

C )  vary between these two extremes

 8.  Which of the following colours do you like most......

 A )  Red or orange

 B )  black

 C )  yellow or light blue

 D )  green

 E )  dark blue or purple

 F )  white

  )  brown or gray

9.   When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are....

A )  stretched out on your back

B )  stretched out face down on your stomach

C )  on your side, slightly curled

D )  with your head on one arm

E )  with your head under the covers

10.   You often dream that you are....

 A )  falling

B )  fighting or struggling

C )  searching for something or somebody

D )  flying or floating

E )  you usually have dreamless sleep

F )  your dreams are always pleasant

POINTS:

 

 

1.  (a ) 2     (b ) 4     (c ) 6

2.  (a ) 6     (b ) 4     (c ) 7     (d ) 2     (e ) 1

3.  (a ) 4     (b ) 2     (c ) 5     (d ) 7     (e ) 6

4.  (a ) 4     (b ) 6     (c ) 2     (d ) 1

5.  (a ) 6     (b ) 4     (c ) 3     (d ) 5     (e ) 2

6.  (a ) 6     (b )

 4     (c ) 2

7.  (a ) 6     (b ) 2     (c ) 4

8.  (a ) 6     (b ) 7     (c ) 5     (d ) 4     (e ) 3     (f ) 2     (g ) 1

9.  (a ) 7     (b ) 6     (c ) 4     (d ) 2     (e ) 1

10 (a ) 4    (b ) 2     (c ) 3    (d ) 5     (e ) 6     (f ) 1

Now add up the total number of points.  then click "continue reading" below to view the answer equivalient.

 

Lexmark Strikes Luzon

A targeted recruiting for the following R&D positions will be held at the Ascott Hotel, Makati City this July 10, 2010, Saturday.

• Software Development Engineers
• Firmware Development Engineers
• Mechanical Design Engineers
• Senior Development Engineers (Software, Firmware, Mechanical Design)
• HR Officer/Business Partner

Invite your Luzon-based friends to drop by at the Belgium Function Hall of the Ascott Hotel for onsite submission of resumes/application from 8am-5pm.

More jobs below

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PUTO: Filipino's Morning Food

In other countries, they just eat bread every morning. In fact, even some of the Filipinos also eat bread every morning. But Mostly, Filipinos want to eat "PUTO". Puto is made from rice but not just an ordinary rice. It is a special kind of rice that seems being mixed with something sticky and Filipinos, particularly in Cebu city Philippines, called it "PILIT". Pilit in Cebu, Philippines means sticky. Then cook it like an ordinary one. If it's cooked already and you think it's now ready to be eaten, then mixed it with coconut oil and put some sugar to until it tasted sweet.

That's how it's being cooked "PUTO".

                                      

In Case of Emergency

We all carry our mobile phones with names & numbers stored in its memory but nobody, other than ourselves, knows which of these numbers belong to our closest family or friends.

If we were to be involved in an accident or were taken ill, the people attending us would have our mobile phone but wouldn't know who to call. Yes, there are hundreds of numbers stored but which one is the contact person in case of an emergency? Hence this "ICE" (In Case of Emergency) Campaign.

The concept of "ICE" is catching on quickly. It is a method of contact during emergency situations. As cell phones are carried by the majority of the population, all you need to do is store the number of a contact person or persons who should be contacted during emergency under the name "ICE" ( In Case Of Emergency).

The idea was thought up by a paramedic who found that when he went to the scenes of accidents, there were always mobile phones with patients, but they didn't know which number to call. He therefore thought that it would be a good idea if there was a nationally recognized name for this purpose. In an emergency situation, Emergency Service personnel and hospital Staff would be able to quickly contact the right person by simply dialling the number you have stored as "ICE."

For more than one contact name simply enter ICE1, ICE2 and ICE3 etc. A great idea that will make a difference!

Let's spread the concept of ICE by storing an ICE number in our Mobile phones today!

Share this to your family, relatives, friends, and anyone you know.

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